First, your used toilet brushes are your own personal property. They go with your shit. They do not belong with the toilets so there’s no need to leave them behind for us. Really. We appreciate the gesture but if you wanted to leave behind a house-warming gift, you could, I suppose, have purchased new ones and left them for us with a little sticky bow on them. But even that is, I think, a tad too personal a gift.
Second, wiping is not the same as cleaning. Especially when somewhere along the line you had the not so brilliant idea of putting tile on your kitchen counter. That brown grout? Guess what - that wasn’t grout.
Third, about the little furry things living in the walls and behind the kitchen cupboards. What? You weren’t aware of them? You thought that you had spilled wild rice in the cupboards? Right.
Yes, I know this is a 40 year old house, near a creek, surrounded by really old trees and that small furry tenants are not unusual. But it would have been nice to know about it ahead of time. It would have been really great if you had dealt with it, or at least told us in advance so we could have dealt with it before we moved in.
Sincerely,
Hornblower
***
Have I grossed you all out? Will nobody want to come visit now? Really, it’s all being taken care of.
And this is fabulous.
The view from the outdoor hot tub. On the left, behind the daffodils and bordered by that brick edging - down there, is the creek.
I uploaded a bunch of garden pictures to flickr - link in sidebar at the bottom.
5 comments:
It's beautiful! And so green! It reminds me of the spreads I've seen in Better Homes & Gardens.
Wishing you many happy days in your new home.
It's gorgeous, Hornblower (the outside part, at least).
Welcome home, and here's to many many hours in that hot tub and out in the garden : )
It's beautiful!
Hope the little furry creatures return to their outdoor habitat quickly. If you find a hole that you *think* they might be coming in, stuff it with tin foil. They won't chew threw it. Now, this works with mice, I'm not sure about squirrels.
Did she say real estate porn? How about if I have a fetish for your garden?
It's so lush. Like, lush. Lush, lush, lush.
Enjoy it for many years to come!
Ohhh, outdoor hottub. With a gorgeous view. I'll visit.
I *know* how I keep house, and I couldn't dream of selling my house without having it professionally cleaned first. Actually, whoever gets my house will not only get it cleaned, but will get all new paint and carpets in the deal. What's not to love? Who needs a house? ... and no furry things, I absolutely promise. And I won't leave our toilet brushes. Ewww. Really, really, ew.
OTOH, in this house we've just moved into (but are renting) I just found two dead mice and one dead ... something else ... outside in the yard. Joy, oh joy.
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