My dogs have balls!!!!

So, I totally blame daylight saving for this because blaming myself is too mature for Monday morning.

When I got up to walk the dogs it was dark! Dark! Dark, I tell ya! Just when I'd gotten used to being able to see the poops left behind by the loser owners who don't poop & scoop, or the even more loser owners who let their dog out the back door & let him crap all over the neighbourhood (Yes, my neighbours out back! I'm talking about you!), just when my shoes were safe again, it's pitch black again for the morning walk.

I put on all our reflective gear, including Daisy's new safety vest which she protests about wearing (if ever a dog was heard to say Moooom, I look like a dork in this!, you'd hear it from Daisy) because I figured everyone else was as discombobulated as I am by the time changing, and would be running late and in the rain and dark would once again try to kill me in my neighbourhood with no sidewalks.

I have gotten much too closely acquainted with some cars (& hedges too, as I dive into them to get away from maniac drivers). My new plan is to throw my poop bags at cars which are threatening my life. I walk 200+ lbs of dogs so usually I have nice big hefty bags of poop. And you know, if a car is coming at you & not moving over & you have to suddenly drag your 200+ lbs of dogs out of the way into a parked car/hedge/garbage cans, you might just accidentally on purpose fling a large bag of poop at a car. Right? It's the most normal thing that a bag of poop would just fly out of your hand in that circumstance. (if you ever see this post disappear, you'll know I did it & had to erase signs of premeditation).

So, there we were this morning, decked out like christmas trees with blinking things and reflective things, and I had the not so brilliant idea of walking a different route, down by the golf course. In my fogged brain, only rain & surviving homicidal drivers was registering and I'd totally forgotten why I don't let the dogs go there.

It's because there is an evil plant living there. I don't know what it is, I've never seen the damned thing, all I ever see is the balls on my dogs when I get home. Balls everywhere. Today, because it was raining and because I towelled off dogs without noticing the balls, they were nicely matted into wet soggy fur.

I'm scared of the camera but .....

....if I've got balls, I'd better show them off!!!!!

Sorry Darwin. Not that kind.

This kind.

All over your ears, your legs, your bum feathers, your tail.....

Gotta go. Lost of brushing ahead!